“Do you feel better?” Ransley’s voice cut through the blurriness inside and around Lucas and he focused his eyes on Ransley’s face. He stared, and stared, and stared. And then…
“I love you”, Lucas blurted out and then smacked his hand to cover his mouth. He had never said it to Ransley and he sure as hell did not mean to blurt it out right there either. “O, shit.”
Ransley smiled at him sadly. “I know, babe.”
Then Ransley pulled Lucas in for a hug. Lucas was so shocked he didn’t at first realise what he was supposed to do but then he wrapped his arms around Ransley and squeezed him, hard.
“Fuck, it feels good to touch someone”, Lucas muttered against Ransley’s chest where he had buried his face. And it really felt good. Lucas felt the need to cry again, but this time they would be tears of happiness. He was so happy that he was finally able to touch someone, feel their warmth and talk with them. And, even though he didn’t say it out loud, he was happy that that someone was Ransley.
“Lucas”, Ransley said and pulled back just enough for him to look in Lucas’ eyes. “I know being dead sucks but–“
“The worst part wasn’t dying”, Lucas said. “It was the awful funeral I had.”
Lucas was joking but Ransley didn’t laugh.
“Funerals are not for those who died”, Ransley said, and touched Lucas’ face. “It’s for the living.”
“What do you mean?” Lucas asked.
“To ease their pain”, Ransley explained. “To get a closure. To say goodbye.”
That made Lucas go silent and think. Then he looked at Ransley and tried really hard not to cry. When had Ransley became so… wise?
“I didn’t get to say goodbye.”
“Then do it now”, Ransley whispered.
“But...”, Lucas glanced back at the people in the cave. “They won’t hear me.”
Ransley smiled slightly, and squeezed Lucas’ shoulders.
“It doesn’t matter, and you know why? Because it’s not for them this time”, he said. “It’s for you.”
“I love you”, Lucas blurted out and then smacked his hand to cover his mouth. He had never said it to Ransley and he sure as hell did not mean to blurt it out right there either. “O, shit.”
Ransley smiled at him sadly. “I know, babe.”
Then Ransley pulled Lucas in for a hug. Lucas was so shocked he didn’t at first realise what he was supposed to do but then he wrapped his arms around Ransley and squeezed him, hard.
“Fuck, it feels good to touch someone”, Lucas muttered against Ransley’s chest where he had buried his face. And it really felt good. Lucas felt the need to cry again, but this time they would be tears of happiness. He was so happy that he was finally able to touch someone, feel their warmth and talk with them. And, even though he didn’t say it out loud, he was happy that that someone was Ransley.
“Lucas”, Ransley said and pulled back just enough for him to look in Lucas’ eyes. “I know being dead sucks but–“
“The worst part wasn’t dying”, Lucas said. “It was the awful funeral I had.”
Lucas was joking but Ransley didn’t laugh.
“Funerals are not for those who died”, Ransley said, and touched Lucas’ face. “It’s for the living.”
“What do you mean?” Lucas asked.
“To ease their pain”, Ransley explained. “To get a closure. To say goodbye.”
That made Lucas go silent and think. Then he looked at Ransley and tried really hard not to cry. When had Ransley became so… wise?
“I didn’t get to say goodbye.”
“Then do it now”, Ransley whispered.
“But...”, Lucas glanced back at the people in the cave. “They won’t hear me.”
Ransley smiled slightly, and squeezed Lucas’ shoulders.
“It doesn’t matter, and you know why? Because it’s not for them this time”, he said. “It’s for you.”
